Like a lot of creatives I have an issue with putting my work out there. It’s not that I’m ashamed of the work, or worried about the quality, I’m not really sure what it is. Maybe it’s a fear of seeming like I’m bragging by implying my work is worth attention. Maybe I’m worried others will think I’m full of myself, or think I’m better at what I do than I actually am. Part of me is probably concerned I’m being wildly optimistic and my work is total crap and I just can’t see it. All the usual stuff that riots in my brain and gets in the way of doing what I want to do.

Recently, however, I’ve discovered a trick that may help me circumvent this issue, and it’s so simple it just might be genius. Here’s what I’ve figured out. I need to treat my work like it’s not mine. Crazy, right? But here’s how I discovered why this actually makes sense.

A friend of mine is a fabulous poet. I mean, really good, writes beautiful, haunting poetry that makes you cry and feel. A while back we were chatting online about an unrelated subject and she mentioned her second book of poetry would be released soon and she had a bit of dread about promoting it. She wished, she said, she could find someone who could do that for her, someone she trusted to do the job right. We talked about it a little more, and moved on to other topics. At the end of the conversation we both walked away thinking the same thing, maybe I was the one who could do the publicizing.

A little while later, that idea was proposed and, after making it clear that, while I was a marketer and had been for decades, I hadn’t done this precise type of work before, had no connections in the industry, and may prove to be crap at the whole thing, we negotiated a fee and made a deal. I was now Director of Publicity for my friend’s poetry, and my job was to get the new book discovered and read.

The running joke about me is that I’m terrible at promoting myself, but aces at promoting others, and while that’s true, I never thought about why. This time I think I get it. While promoting my friend’s work, I’ve reached for the stars. No outlet is too impossible to ask for a review. No podcast is too lofty to suggest my friend as a guest. I believe in her, her commitment to her craft, and her work, so no ask is too big. After all, what’s the worst that can happen? I get a no? O.k., move on to the next possibility.

That’s not to imply that, for me, this is low stakes. I care about my friend and her work. I think, passionately, that people should read it, that it’s life changing stuff. I want the book to sell and I want to do the job I’ve been tasked with well. So, I do have an investment here. It is not, however, the same investment I have in my own work.

And that’s what’s made all the difference. With my work, I’m Oliver Twist, timidly offering it and asking “please sir” as I hope for an opportunity. With my friend’s work, I’m Arnold Schwarzenegger, kicking down the door and demanding (politely, of course) people pay attention. There’s no fear of what people will think, no worry about getting a no. I’m all about the possibility, and if one possibility doesn’t work out, I’ll move on until I find the one that does.

Here, finally, is the revelation. If I can believe in someone else’s work and promote it so fearlessly, maybe the key to doing the same with my own work is treating it like it’s not mine. Take that one step away, become a little detached, and let the outcome be what it is, without judgment or impact. Have less ego and more optimism, and take the same pride in what I do as I take in what others do. Treat my work like the way I treat my friend’s work, with the same admiration, estimation of worth and determination. It’s not a blinding revelation, more like a shift in perspective, but it just might work.

Postscript: My friend’s work is really good, her poetry is beautiful. Her new collection is called The Luster of Everything I’m Already Forgetting. You can pick up a copy on Amazon or get a signed copy on her website. If you’re on Facebook and want to follow what Nicole is doing, you can join her Facebook group.